Tiger Mom and Eagle Dad

For many years, it has been reported that Asians are consistently outperforming Caucasians academically. One report suggests that Asian students work harder than their counterpart for their phenomenal academic performance.

Why Asian-American Students Outperform Their White Peers

While it may be true Asian students work harder, it does not however explain the reason why they work harder and the actual underlying motivation for them to work harder other than their “outsider” status in the host country.

Another report suggests that higher Asian parental expectation for their children’s academic performance is another reason why Asian students outperform US students. US parents are content with having lower academic performance for their children and this is not helping their children to level up to Asian students.

Why Asian Students Still Outdistance Americans

The above reports are based on observations seen through the lens of westerners’ perspective and they do not address the actual inner psychic of traditional Asians. Many Chinese hope and desire their sons to become dragon and their daughters to become phoenix according to the proverbial sayings, 望子成龙,望女成风.

Dragon and phoenix symbolize power and wealth. In time past, Chinese emperors wore dragon robes. Chinese believe they are descendants of dragons. By the way, there is a very famous Chinese song, Descendants of the Dragons, and Chinese cannot but be moved by the lyrics of this song which is quite melodious.

Since it is the hopes of Chinese parents for their children to become a symbol of success when they grow up, this process cannot be left to chance. Children are taught from young to live a disciplined life according to this Chinese proverb, 玉不琢 不成器 人不学 不知义。

Like jade that requires cutting and polishing to become a much sought after masterpiece, children are required to undergo rigorous training from young to become some outstanding person when they grow up. A child who does not learn will not understand righteousness is the second part of this proverb and hence the constant emphasis on learning.

So it has been driven into the inner psychic of Chinese parents to teach their children to pursue academic excellence from a young age as recorded in the Chinese classic written in 1100 AD, 万般皆下品,唯有读书高.

Every occupation on earth is rather common but academic excellence is of the highest esteem. Therefore, this constant forward looking posture of acquiring knowledge is a Chinese tradition drilled into the minds of children at a young age.

By the way, such thinking and work ethics also hold true for Koreans, Japanese, Taiwanese and even Vietnamese. A visit to the Temple of Literature in Hanoi City will show how much Chinese influence has taken hold on the Vietnamese even of today.

As such, this gives rise to some overbearing parents to become tiger moms micromanaging the lives of their children and their everyday activities in the pursuit of excellence in every aspect of life. Of course this does not sound like fun but once success has been achieved, looking back, the child would understand why the mother has to be very strict and rigid with the upbringing regime.

The Tiger Mom Effect Is Real, Says Large Study

In addition, some children bore the brunt of rigorous training and discipline from eagle dad at a very young age. The kind of training some of these little kids go through will shock many. It is like putting these kids through special force or army rangers training at a tender young age.

Eagle Dad Regime

So learning and pursuing academic success become part of the psychic of Chinese from young so much so even Cantopop singer and song writer Sam Hui wrote a song 学生哥 to encourage young children to pursue their studies when they are young lest they regret later in their life.

To the Chinese, not doing well academically shames the family. Decades ago, a neighbour of mine failed his national examinations at age 12 and he dared not return home after getting his results from school. He eventually came home after a very long reflection and fearing retributive punishment back home. He had to repeat another year to sit for the national examinations again the following year. Education is a serious business for Asians.

This constant need to excel does take a toll on some. Last month, a Japanese father stabbed his 12 year old son to death for failing to study for a school entrance exam.

Japanese Man Stabs 12 Year Old Son to Death For Failing Exam

This is tragic no less. High parental expectation on children has probably driven some to suicide. A couple of years back, a young girl having done pretty well for her Cambridge Ordinary Level examinations except for one or two subjects that she failed to score a distinction committed suicide. A few months after, her mother took her own life as well. The father was reduced to a mental wreck requiring professional help since.

Another tragic case was reported in Canada in 2010. A bright young Vietnamese girl was put through the strict non-nonsense regime by her parents hoping she would become successful someday. She was doing pretty well during the initial years but dropped out thereafter and she lied to her parents about making it into the University of Toronto.

Eventually when her parents found out about her deceit, she was grounded. Her boy friend then conspired with her to hire killers to murder her parents and then inherit the property. Tragically, her mother died during the assault.

Daughter of Vietnamese Immigrants Hired Hit Men to Kill Her Parents

This is one of those sad stories of human frailties struggling to make it in this fallen world. The apostle Paul told the Corinthians the distinction on the preoccupation between the Jews and the Greeks.

1 Corinthians 1:22: For the Jews require a sign, and the Greeks seek after wisdom:

Here the Asians are the modern Greeks going all out to acquire wisdom and knowledge in this world clutching at straws for a better hope and future for their children. This is of course understandable as they do not have the promise of God providing for them and meeting their every needs like the children of Israel in the Old Testament and Christians in the New Testament.

Matthew 6:31: Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?

Matthew 6:32: (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things.

Matthew 6:33: But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

Matthew 6:34: Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

The wisest man who ever lived made this remark concerning pursuing academic excellence.

Ecclesiastes 12:12: And further, by these, my son, be admonished: of making many books there is no end; and much study is a weariness of the flesh.

King Solomon was of course so right. Who in the world would think that doing well academically is just a piece of cake! King Solomon who went out of the way to master everything under the sun and then concluded that all was vanity. Hence his closing advice was this:

Ecclesiastes 12:13: Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.

For the struggling humanity wallowing in the depths of despair and misery, there is a way out of this mad rat race of life.

Malachi 1:11: For from the rising of the sun even unto the going down of the same my name shall be great among the Gentiles; and in every place incense shall be offered unto my name, and a pure offering: for my name shall be great among the heathen, saith the LORD of hosts.

The Lord Jesus Christ is the name the Gentiles shall trust and great is His mighty name who came to heal the broken hearts and restore hopes of life eternal to those who seek after Him.

Titus 1:2: In hope of eternal life, which God, that cannot lie, promised before the world began;

Of making many books there is no end, but Jesus came to be the book of books where those who finds Him will never have to suffer weariness of the flesh again.

Hebrews 10:7: Then said I, Lo, I come (in the volume of the book it is written of me,) to do thy will, O God.

John 21:25: And there are also many other things which Jesus did, the which, if they should be written every one, I suppose that even the world itself could not contain the books that should be written. Amen.

Christians parents should take heed how they raise their children in this world and not getting caught up with the folly of many parents seeking the best for their children without factoring in the Lord into the equation of their child raising regime.


Gender Neutral Parenting

Raising children used to come naturally to new parents. However, parenting in the modern world is complicated by many new trends from the wisdom in this world coming up with many fanciful ideas. Some new parents even attend courses to learn how to be good parents.

Parents of old without the benefits of New Age thinking have been successful in raising wholesome children for generations. This is no longer the case when modern day parents chase after material well-being for the family instead of spiritual and moral well-being of their children. Hence, in many highly urbanized societies, children are left to the care of domestic helpers or day care care givers. The end results are not really pretty which is evidenced in the warning given by the apostle Paul.

2 Timothy 3:2: For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,

If you think parental neglect of children to certain extent due to families having to rely on a dual-income to support the family is tragic, this latest warped idea of raising children letting them explore and discover their gender identities is even worse.

Why I’m Raising My Kids To Be Gender Neutral

Some parents allow their children the choice to discover their own gender and even allow them to cross dress to see if they prefer to be male or female. This is a direct rejection of the God’s ordained calling for the children.

Genesis 1:27: So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.

They believe that if there is a God at all, God could have made a mistake with the birth of the child. So they allow little children to explore and experiment to decide on their gender preference in the future. This is folly of the highest order.

Children lack understanding and they must be taught on many things pertaining to this life, including who they are and how to behave as male and female.

1 Corinthians 14:20: Brethren, be not children in understanding: howbeit in malice be ye children, but in understanding be men.

Children need to learn and grow and wean off their childishness to become an adult in the future.

1 Corinthians 13:11: When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

It is the responsibility of parents to teach and train their children, in particular, concerning the truth in the Holy Bible.

Proverb 22:6: Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

For those irresponsible parents who cause their children to become confused and adopt a lifestyle incongruent with their gender, they will reap what they sow. The Holy Bible clearly warns against certain category of people who being effeminate will not inherit the kingdom of God.

1 Corinthians 6:9: Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,

Interestingly, some of those modern false bibles conveniently left out the category of effeminate creatures. No doubt, these are New Age bibles.

Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men (NIV)

Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, (NKJV)

Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, (ESV)

You know that wicked people will not inherit the kingdom of God, don’t you? Stop deceiving yourselves! Sexually immoral people, idolaters, adulterers, male prostitutes, homosexuals, (ISV)

Christian parents should do well to immerse themselves in the scriptures to raise up goodly children for the Lord and not follow some mindless trends in the world.

1 Corinthians 3:19: For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God. For it is written, He taketh the wise in their own craftiness.

Psalms 127:3: Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.

Psalms 127:4: As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth.

Psalms 127:5: Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.


Will You Marry Your Self?

The advent of digital cameras, in particular on mobile phones, make it very easy and cheap to take pictures at any moment in time. Gone are the days where taking pictures are expensive having to buy rolls of films where you have to think twice before snapping away on your cameras, not to mention costly fees required to process the rolls of film and hopefully the pictures come out fine.

Who won’t want to capture a beautiful image especially with yourself in the picture too. In the past, you would need someone to take such a picture for you. Today, you could just take your own picture with the secondary camera on your mobile handset. With the aid of a selfie stick, you could take pictures of yourself at a greater distance which is even better.

Unfortunately, taking selfie is contributing to untimely deaths and injuries for some so engrossed in such acts of self importance and grandeur to capture the perfect moment in time for posterity and future self-exultation. Narcissism becomes popular and sometimes not cheap, even deadly.

List of Selfie-Related Injuries and Deaths

With the popularity promoting platforms like facebook and instagram, narcissism is taken on to a whole new level of indulgence. Spending time showing off and bragging about stuff on facebook coveting affirmation and adulation can become an addiction, especially those who set out hoping to get many friends and “likes” on their facebook page a life mission.

If you think that is not enough of self-love, self-praise and self-centeredness, you can even marry your own self if you so wish. You can fall in love with your own self and marry your self just like a normal wedding with a huge party following. This trend is going to pick up just like any foolish fashion in this world that will pass away.

No Need Husband – Women Can Now Marry Themselves

When you think this is narcissism gone mad, this is not something unexpected actually, scripturally speaking.

2 Timothy 3:2: For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,

Haven’t we been warned about the last days’ conditions? Indeed men shall be lovers of their own selves literally. This is perhaps the grand finale of narcissism in all its glory.

This is good news actually because we are not far from the end of times.

Hopefully some will wake up and share the sentiments of the psalmist who exclaimed:

Psalms 39:5: Behold, thou hast made my days as an handbreadth; and mine age is as nothing before thee: verily every man at his best state is altogether vanity. Selah.